Ok, I know, the jury is still
out. Some say - and have made an obscene amount of money
saying it – that gluten is the root of all eating-evil. They say most of the multitudinous obese Americans
should blame their rotund waistlines and generally poor health on wheat, rye,
barley, and being overly familiar with Crispy-Kreme.
Then I read another article
that claimed, of the 18% of Americans who go gluten-free, about 1% of them
really need to. Also read the % is far
less than 1%. I’m confused, which you
can tell from the whiff of first-class whisky on my breath.
I’m ashamed to admit it, but
I’m not a scientist, or a medical doctor, or a dietician. On the other hand, I don’t have to carry a
Ship Load of Insurance. And, to my credit, I’m also not either a politician or
an economist.
I’m just a normal, whiskey
drinking, boob obsessed guy. I don’t go
racing through the streets, waving my arms, screaming about the downfall of
civilization when I see someone eating bread.
I save that for when I run out of beer. Beer, by the way also has gluten. Damn you, Goddess-of-the-Harvest!
I do have friends (which may
come as a shock) who are gluten-free for both cosmetic and genuine health
reasons. And I have to admit I’ve seen
dramatic results from those diagnosed with Celiac
disease who have chosen to go gluten-free.
Even when it’s not called
gluten-free, there are a lot of diet regimens that don’t allow grains. Akins and Peleo are just two I can
mention. Every diet has it’s bad points.
Those two also leave out essentials, like pudding, and French-fries.
Some things you may think have gluten don't: Rice in all its
forms and corn in all its forms, plus millet, buckwheat, quinoa, sorghum, soy, potatoes,
and others.
Ah, science. It’s wonderful moving target. The so-called ‘facts’ change with the next
set of data points. So refreshing. Yesterday’s scoundrel (eggs, fat) is today’s
hail-fellow-well-met. Redemption by data.
But, let’s skip the petty
bickering and get to the real ‘biscuit in the oven.’ For those who want to go gluten-free and are
tired of corn tortillas, baked potatoes, and grits, I have a semi-wonderful
alternative to make those newly redeemed mornings of streaky bacon and
eggs-over-easy really blossom.
Gluten-free Biscuits! Easy to
make, easy to bake. You can even call
them muffins if you want to feel really, really naughty.
The very simple recipe:
Preheat the oven to 450ºF
(230ºC)
In a medium bowl, mix two cups
of gluten-free flour, two heaping tablespoons of baking powder, and a half-teaspoon
of salt. Stir well.
Using a pastry cutter or a
fork, cut-in 6 tablespoons of butter.
The mixture should look grainy.
Thoroughly stir in one cup of
water. The batter will be as thin as
pancake batter. Wait a minute or two and
it will thicken to the consistency of cake batter.
Grease eight muffin cups and
fill them with equal amounts of batter.
Put the pan in the oven and bake for 14 minutes. The muffins will rise and turn tan. They’re ready! Don’t wait for them to brown.
Voilà! Perfectly delicious! Ready for jam, unless you’re diabetic, or
lactose free, or just not into feeling really, really naughty.
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