French Breakfast Puffs By the Careless Cook

 The Careless Cook is back.  I know it gets ho-hum to read about another bout with muffins, but this batch is worth your while. Even the name sounds tasty and European and glamorous: French Breakfast Puffs!  Ah, yes. French cafes, the softness of misunderstood language, spoken at a reasonable level.  Civil Conversations. Slim men and women, no matter the age, who could be fashion models.

Have you been to France lately, or Germany, or the UK, or Europe in general?  You may have noticed, unlike Americans, the Europeans do not dress in rags or slosh down food and coffee in disreputable grab-and-go second class slop shops. And which of those joints use ceramic cups instead of classless paper cup trash?

 No, and no again, those in more civilized countries sit, well-dressed, in sidewalk cafes that make you want to leisurely sip a coffee and come back every morning for fresh pastry, served by professional waiters and waitresses.  By the way, you may quickly surmise I do not use the word waitstaff. Have a little pride in your sex, for goodness sakes!

Ok, lovers of civility, let's put some easily made, wonderful French Breakfast Puffs on your table at home!

Set you oven to 350ºF or 180ºC

Ingredients:

3 cups flour

1 tablespoon baking powder

1 teaspoon salt

1/3 teaspoon nutmeg

1 cup sugar

1 cup butter at room temp.....I used my microwave

1 cup milk at room temp....once again...microwave in my kitchen!

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

For The Topping

1/3 cup melted butter

3/4 cup sugar

1 teaspoon cinnamon

Puttin' It Together

Grease muffin cups with butter, or do as I do and use Teflon muffin trays, with paper muffin cups inserted.

Get a sizable bowl and toss in all the dry ingredients (not the topping ingredients!!! for goodness sakes!) use a fork or whisk to stir.

In a larger bowl, use an electric beater to whip butter and sugar together.  Blend in the eggs.

Now beat in milk and the flour mixture, some of each at a time, until all are well blended.

Put a 2/3 cup of dough into each muffin tin or paper cup and bake for about 20 to 25 minutes.  The edges should be brown, or you can use a toothpick and make sure it comes out clean.

Allow the baked muffins to cool.

Time to mix the sugar and cinnamon for the toping.

Now paint the muffins tops with the melted butter and dip the tops of the muffins in the sugar mixture.

Voilà! You'll be tossing your paper cups and plates before you know it!

You may even begin to use cloth napkins, just like civilized people!

Banana-Coconut-Walnut-Cinnamon Muffins by The Careless Cook

 

Banana-Coconut-Walnut-Cinnamon Muffins by The Careless Cook

 

What if you need to feed muffins to about twenty hungry ladies who have flitted past the age of consent long ago and hurdled a few other milestones?  What if you only have an hour or so to complete this wondrous task?  Now let’s up the ante.  Suppose your culinary career and high hopes for a settled and peaceful home-life rides on your performance?

 

Can it be done?  Well, of course and The Careless Cook will lead you on, smiling and cheerful.  Who knows, you may even get in return sly winks from your fatted calves and promises of sweet reminders of your youth, like chocolate cookies and your grandmother’s peanut brittle.  If you are lucky, you may even get pecks on the cheek, but I wouldn’t count on it.  There are limits.

 

Admittedly, The Careless Cook keeps a well-stocked larder, so if my three faithful followers lag behind in the fundamentals of chefery, they may need to make a quick trip to a nearby grocery.  And let that be a lesson to you!

 

It’s football season, so I’ll put it this way:  Are you ready to cook?  I SAID:  ARE YOU READY TO COOK?  YES, you scream, as we break the huddle and head to the kitchen.

 

Time to get on with it.

 

Sometimes the best recipes may be found on common packaging and so it was with this one from a box of Bran Flakes.  But, of course, being careless by nature and habit, The Careless Cook had to make a few minor changes, all of which are pleasing.

 

Banana-Coconut-Walnut-Cinnamon Muffins.

I realize that’s a mouthful. You may want to casually 

 mention Bran Muffins and let your hungry hordes guess

 the rest.

 

NOTE:  You may have noticed I frequently use my food processor for blending bakery dough or batter.  NOT THIS TIME.  ALL IS HAND MIXED IN A BOWL, WITH A WHISK.

 

Ingredients

 

2 cups of bran flakes

1 ripe banana, mashed

1 x 13.66 ounce can of coconut milk, or whatever amount your can says

½ cup brown sugar

1 egg

1 teaspoon of vanilla extract…I just used a slosh

1 ½ cups of flour. I used unbleached all purpose

½ to ¾ cups of chopped walnuts

1 good handful of sweetened, shredded coconut

1 ½ teaspoons baking soda

¾ teaspoon ground cinnamon, or a bit more

½ teaspoon salt  - don’t you just hate it when recipe

writers turn up their noses to show off their delicate sensitivities by specifying what kind of salt, like kosher salt or sea salt?  Yes there are some minor differences, but with ½ teaspoon, sodium chloride is sodium chloride!

 

People sometimes ask me, is salt really kosher?  No.  It’s a heavy grained salt, with no additives, used to season or preserve kosher meat.

 

Puttin’ It Together

 

Preps:

Heat your oven to 375ºF (with my oven, which runs a little hot, I used 350ºF)

Smear a 12 cup muffin tin with butter.  I used my fingers to smear and to make sure the tins were well coated. 

 

I was making 20+ muffins, so I used two 12 cup muffin tins and only filled them halfway.

 

1. Put bran cereal and coconut milk in a large bowl and stir well. Add banana, sugar, vanilla, and egg.  Stir until well blended.  Now whisk in remaining ingredients (except for flour and baking soda) until well blended.

 

2. Whisk together the flour and baking soda, and blend in with the other ingredients, a little at a time.

 

3. Put the batter in the muffin tins and shove them in the oven for 20 minutes.  Since I was only filling my cups half full, I used 18 minutes. Either way, test by inserting a toothpick in a muffin.  Should come out clean.

 

Time to finish that morning snifter of brandy and pat yourself on the back, if you can still reach your back.  If not, either join a yoga class, or ask the ladies to do the patting.

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