Coconut Biscuits From The Careless Cook

 

Coconut Biscuits From The Careless Cook

 

Think of biscuits as the culinary equivalent of a painter’s blank canvas.  The recipe is simple, unadorned, but the baker is free…at least this baker is free…to add any other ingredients.  Use your imagination, or let me spare you the mental anguish and let you borrow mine.

 

In this case I decided to bake for a couple of dozen fiercely hungry women.  So, now you’re asking yourself, why would The Careless Cook do this?  Should you have doubts about the goodness of his heart? What dark motives lurk behind this largess?  Are these women that gullible?  I pick my targets carefully.

 

Those who know me know I have no dark motives.  Well, not many, and none I want to discuss.

 

I understand your strained enthusiasm, so to clear the murky waters, I will confess.  I like to bake, but I am unwilling to consume all my baked goods, lest my exploding bicycle tires scare the neighbors and my talking scale yells, “One at a time please.”

 

So, what do I do?  What any altruistic baker does.  I let the emaciated women in my wife’s Bible Study class bear the brunt of my over-productive calories.  They never once complain, nor do they toss rolls and muffins at me as I speed away from the parking lot.

 

I call this exploiting a thin win situation.

 

While you discuss my lapses in culinary morality, let’s get to bakin’.

 

Coconut Biscuits From The Careless Chef

 

Ingredients

 

2 cups flour (either all-purpose or bread, and I prefer unbleached)

3 tablespoons baking powder

1 teaspoon salt

1/3 cups white sugar

6 tablespoons butter

1 cup milk

1 ½ cups sweetened shredded coconut (or more if it suits you)

 

Note:  Rather use dark sugar?  Perhaps some honey?  The Careless Chef encourages you to follow your dreams!

 

Puttin’ It Together

 

I use a food processor with a dough attachment, but feel free to use a bowl and do it the traditional way.

 

Put the dry ingredients (except the coconut flakes) in the processor and pulse a couple of times. Add chunks of butter and use the dough setting to mix well.

 

Now add the milk and the coconut flakes and fully mix.  Your dough should separate from the sides of the processor. If not, add a 1/4 cup of flour.  You may need to do this twice, but be judicious. You want your dough soft, but not sticky.

 

Dust your counter with flour and roll out the dough to about ½ an inch thick.  Square up the dough as best you can and cut it in squares.

 

Put the dough on an ungreased baking sheet and bake for 10-12 minutes at 350ºF or 180ºC.  Every oven is different, so it’s best to use an oven thermometer to make sure of the temp.  Twelve minutes in my oven is a bit too long.

 

Now, it’s time to package these tasty morsels and take them to the tired, the hungry, the unsuspecting. 

 

Meanwhile, I shall find other nefarious ways to entertain myself.

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Cassoulet My Way by The Careless Cook

 

Cassoulet My Way by The Careless Cook

 

Cassoulet is a traditional French dish that started in southeastern France, on the border with Spain and Andora, and like all good things…especially food…it spread across the country and into every French household. You may see a recipe for “Classic” cassoulet, but rest assured that every mother in France has her own recipe. Finding the original recipe is as difficult as finding the Garden of Eden and resisting a bite of the apple, offered by a lovely lady wearing fig leaves and smiling suggestively.

 

By the way, who taught the serpent to talk before language was invented?  I’d guess sign language, but serpents don’t have hands and can’t blink their eyes to signal “One if by mouth, Two if you’ll settle for a fig.”

 

Originally, like all good dishes that outlast their origin, cassoulet was a peasant dish, whose main ingredients were meat and white beans. After you lock onto those two, do what you will and nobody’s going to call you a liar, at least not to your face.  Hence the expression, Watch your back! Itself a gymnastic event.  Only Marie Antoinette was able to accomplish that, but she lost her head over it on her first try.

 

So, with the spread of cassoulet, it’s no wonder, as I sipped brandy and pondered what was in my pantry, that I called my dish Cassoulet My Way.

 

After all, a recipe is just the start of the process…..no, wait a minute….curiosity is the start, next comes a recipe, and then the high point is “Well, watta ya know, I don’t got no duck fat.  Gonna have to wing it.”

 

Some things I left out:  duck fat, chicken with bones and skin, and soaking dried cannellini beans overnight.   But, let’s not fight about it, especially since I’m the one pouring the brandy and feeding the suffering masses by simplifying your work in the kitchen, allowing you to create a dish that will delight your family, and/or loved ones.

 

But enough listening to the pitter-patter of little tongues.  Let’s get cookin!

 

FIRST, A VERY IMPORTANT THING TO REMEMBER.  THIS DISH WILL COOK FOR SIX HOURS IN A 300ºF OVEN.   CONSIDER MAKING IT THE NIGHT BEFORE OR PREPARING IT AT NOON AND SERVING IT FOR SUPPER.

 

Ingredients:

 

2 cans of cannelloni beans drained and rinsed

1 32 oz carton of chicken broth

3 packets of unflavored gelatin

4 strips of thick bacon, diced

6 boneless, skinless chicken thighs

2 to 4 links of garlic sausage (I used 2 links of mild Italian)

2 shallots, or one half of a sweet onion, peeled and chopped

1 cup baby carrots

1 cup celery, sliced

whole head of garlic, peeled, but not chopped

salt and pepper to taste

Puttin’ It Together – use a big pot or Dutch oven

Add the bacon to the pot on low heat and cook until the fat is rendered and the bacon only partly crisp. Set the bacon aside, dust the chicken thighs with salt and pepper, place in the rendered fat and cook until lightly browned on both sides.

 

Meanwhile, put half the chicken stock in a separate pot and when heated, sprinkle in the gelatin and stir well.  Set aside.

 

Remove the chicken thighs and add the sausages, shallots, and garlic to the pot. Cook until the sausage, the shallots, and the garlic cloves are lightly browned.

 

Remove the sausages and slice medium thick.  (see photo)

Note:  Neither the chicken thighs nor the sausage will be cooked through, but don’t worry; they will cook in the stew a long time.

Finishing up: Add the carrots, celery, bacon, sausage, and beans to the pot.  Stir well.  Add all 32 oz of chicken broth, then place the chicken thighs on top, pushing them into the broth. Bring to a low boil.

 

Put the uncovered pot in the 300ºF oven and cook for two hours.

 

A crust will form.  Break the crust and cook another 4 hours, breaking the crust from time to time.  In the last hour, a good portion of the liquid will have evaporated.

 

Remove the pot from the oven, and serve in bowls with toast points.  Add chopped parsley if you choose.   

 

Time to crack open that bottle of dry white wine!

 

Salut! Now sing La Marseillaise without spilling your wine!

 

 

 

 

An Honorable Man, by Paul Vidich

 

An Honorable Man, by Paul Vidich

 

An Honorable Man is set in the early, turbulent 1950’s in American.  World War II was over, but the cold war had just begun.  And with the cold war came internecine skirmishes between the tried and true Federal Bureau of Investigation and the new kid on the intelligence block, the Central Intelligence Agency, an organization that had its roots in World War II and the Office of Strategic Services.

 

Add to that what has become known as The Red Scare, when Senator Joseph McCarthy of Wisconsin alleged that the U.S. was infested with Soviet Agents, throughout the government and the nation, and waves of conflict washed over every government agency and every government employee.

 

You may see tangential elements in our own time.  Substitute any number of today’s angry labels for ‘communist’ in the 1950s.  Pick your own metaphor, but The Red Scare, like so many other sloppy paintings was like putting on lipstick with a wet mop. Yes, there were communists in government, but the splatter fell on the good and the bad and the innocent.

 

Have you heard of The House Un-American Activities Committee?  Think of the 1950’s so-called blacklist in Hollywood.

 

The whole political time carried the stench of an open sewer, and yet intelligence activity prodded on, with the CIA and the Soviet counterpart doing their best to outsmart each other.  In the U.S. there were scandals and spies and trials.  On the Soviet side there were roundups and executions.

 

Paul Vidich takes the reader into the messy past, with characters on each side and devoted to each agency, with point and counter point.

 

And in this novel there are spies and counterspies and conspiracies and counter conspiracies, but all focused on the human element, the decisions and indecisions and personal angst, and person tragedies

 

Some authors tell a story and others, the very best ones, make you live a story.  It’s what has been said many times, that a good novelist turns poetry into prose.  Vidich lives up to that high standard, with short, but effective descriptions that bring moods and situations into focus.

 

Some examples:

 

“The monastic cell suited his suffering and after he’d returned divorced from Vienna and his life was turned upside down.    He’d moved in on a temporary basis, but one month became three years with the deceptive ease of a film dissolve.”

 

 

“I need to speak to you,” Beth said, urgently, “Can I come in?”

 

There were hints of greasepaint on her neck when she’d rushed to leave the dressing room after her evening performance.  She still wore mascara, and she’d been crying, which had made her eyeliner run.”

 

You will grow to know these characters in An Honorable Man.  They confide in you.  They bring out the best and worst in each other. But, even so, you’ll find you don’t know all their secrets, but the tightly woven plot makes you yearn to know.  An Honorable Man will lead you down back alleys and into the world of spies and the realm of constant suspicion.   Tight. Exciting. Keeps you on edge to the last page.

Magical Mac and Cheese from The Careless Cook

 

Magical Mac and Cheese from The Careless Cook

 

All too often, I pass on Mac and Cheese because so many times it’s sensationally blah.  Of course I make great exception for your mom’s mac and cheese, which is always blended with lovely memories, which overshadow those times she made you eat broccoli and boiled cauliflower. 

 

My mother did not make Mac and Cheese, but she did like me very much.  She liked my brother a lot also, which I could never understand.

 

But, I have good news for you from the Mac and Cheese front.  I have a recipe for absolutely Magical Mac and Cheese.  And I’m happy to say it does not use vegan rubberized non-cheese, or gluten free macaroni, both of which are outlawed in many parts of the civilized world.  But, yes, I do have vegan friends, who always smell faintly of broccoli and boiled cauliflower.  Oh, come on you Veganites!  You can take a joke if you put your mind to it!

 

Magical Mac and Cheese

 

Ingredients

 

16 oz package of macaroni (I used Ronzoni, Large Elbows)

1 tablespoon of extra virgin olive oil (I’ve yet to meet an extra virgin, but surely…)

6 tablespoons butter

1/3 Cup flour

3 cups milk (I used whole milk)

1 cup heavy cream

4 cups sharp cheddar, shredded (I shred my own)

2 cups baby Swiss cheese, shredded or chopped (some recipes call for Gruyere, but it’s expensive and to me the baby Swiss tastes almost exactly the same.  If you disagree, I suggest you have that second glass of wine and taste again.)

salt and pepper to taste (Be gentle with the salt. I use salted butter and the cheese also has salt.)

6 slices of bacon, chopped and fried to a crisp

½ large sweet onion, diced and cooked until translucent

¾ cup sundried tomatoes in oil, drained and chopped finely

 

For the Topping

1 ½ cups panko crumbs

½ cup shredded Parmesan

4 tablespoons of melted butter

¼ teaspoon of smoked paprika (opitional)

 

The Set Up:  

heat oven to 350ºF or 180ºC

Grease a 3-4 quart baking dish

 

Puttin’ It Together

 

Put the  Swiss and cheddar cheeses in a bowl and set aside

 

Cook the pasta as directed on the package, but a minute or two short of al dente.  Remember, you’re going to add milk and cheese and if you cook the pasta too long it’s going to be soggy after the additions.  

 

Remove the pasta and drain, reserving one cup of pasta water.  Place the pasta in a bowl, allow the pasta to cool and slosh it with a bit of olive oil.  Be very careful of all those extra virgins.

 

In a stock pot or large saucepan, on medium heat,  melt the butter, whisk in the flour and keep whisking until you see those tiny bubbles on the edges of the pot/pan, then whisk for another two minutes.

 

Add two cups of cheese to the pan and whisk until smooth, add the rest of the cheese in portions and whisk until the sauce is smooth and creamy.

Add the milk and cream and stir well.

 

Add the sundried tomato bits, bacon, and onion and stir vigorously until well blended. 

 

Stir in the pasta until it’s well coated with the cheese sauce.

 

Pour the Mac and Cheese mixture into the greased baking dish.

Time to Make the Topping

 

Add all topping ingredients to a bowl and mix well.  Sprinkle the mixture evenly over the Mac and Cheese.

 

Bake for about 30 minutes, or until the topping is lightly browned.

 

NOTE:  All ovens are different.  You may need slightly more or less baking time and if your oven heats unevenly, you will need to rotate the baking dish as needed.

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Maigret and the Man on the Boulevard, by Georges Simenon

 

Maigret and the Man on the Boulevard, by Georges Simenon

 

Georges Simenon (Georg –ah See-me-non) (1903 – 1989) was a Belgian author who wrote a startling number of books, including seventy-seven featuring his most famous detective, Inspector Maigret (me-gray), with all of the Maigret books set in Paris.  It’s said (I see different figures in different articles), that besides the Maigret series, Simenon wrote another 325 books. Yes, the man put other writers to shame.  He wrote an astounding sixty to eighty pages a day!  In fact, he wrote so fast that when the famous film director, Alfred Hickok telephoned and was told by Simenon’s secretary the author couldn’t be disturbed because he was beginning a new novel, Hickok said:  That’s alright, I’ll wait.

 

But, the big question about a book is always:  Is it worth reading?  Lots of ways to answer that, depending on why you’re reading.  Medical books, legal tomes?  No thanks.  Not for me.  But, mysteries and thrillers?  Bring ‘em on, but even then I may have reservations and I’m not above getting to page fifty or even page one hundred and tossing the book aside.  Plot, character, and style all have to blend in order to hold my attention, when I could be sipping a Martini, or tuning in reruns of the Beverly Hillbillies, or watching lizards gobble flies, which shows I’m not as particular about other things as I am about books. 

 

Simenon’s first Maigret novels were published in 1931….eleven of them that year.  He wrote through the 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, and 70s.  All and all, besides being a fascinating author, he was a fascinating man, with several mistresses, a speaker of both French and English (or more languages I don’t know about) and living all over Europe, as well as Canada and the U.S.  You might say he sucked the marrow out of the bones of life.

 

But, let’s get back to the book, Maigret and the Man on the Boulevard.  It was first published in French, of course, but in serialized form in Le Figaro, in 1953, as Maigret et l’Homme du Banc.  In America the title was changed to Maigret and the Man on the Boulevard and published in 1975.  

 

 Here’s a thumbnail:  A man is stabbed on the street, a man who seemed to have no enemies, was by all accounts a devoted husband and a hard worker.  And, he wasn’t robbed.  Maigret is the kind of real detective who takes his time, exploring every avenue and back alley to survey the territory, interview people, and allow the investigation to uncoil like a lazy snake.

 

I realize that tastes change and it’s a true about books as it is about music and films. You discover the truth of that when you find your sons and daughter splitting their sides when some idiot on TV pats his head three times and jumps up and down with a goofy look on his face, while you sit there as silent and unmoved as an overcooked pot roast.  And music?  We shant go there. In so many cases, TV detectives find the culprit in 30 minutes, or the slow ones in an hour.  Along the way, there are only three possible villains, all usually introduced in the first ten minutes.

 

I call these fast food mysteries.  And lord knows we Americans are addicted to fast food.  But, with Inspector Maigret, you must be willing to sit down to dine, as one course follows another, then take a postprandial walk through the streets and back alleys of the Paris that largely disappeared decades ago.  If that’s your type of book, then lick your lips, sip your wine, and sit down to a feast.  Maigret is on the case.