Quiche Lorraine a Long Way From Lorraine

Quiche Lorraine a Long Way From Lorraine

Best quiche I’ve ever eaten was at a small outdoor café on the Place St Jacques in Metz, France. Haven’t been back in over a year and the light and exquisite quiche still calls to my taste buds, tenderly and sweetly.  Taste buds don’t forget.

The real thing, in Lorraine

Want the history of Quiche Lorraine?  Didn’t think so and frankly it’s a little hard to track down the origin among the plethora of dishes made with eggs and cream.  The name may have come from the German word for cake, Kuchen, but even that’s as uncertain as a blind man walking the plank.  

But, history or no history, I decided to make quiche.  You may be surprised I didn’t just fly to France and sit at the outdoor café, or sign up for Le Cordon Bleu in Paris. My wife was surprised, too.  But, in these times of stress, one does not venture far from home.  One may not be able to venture back.

Before I give you the recipe, you have to understand that for every sexy woman in Lorraine, there are at least two versions of quiche.  Most share the common ingredients:  eggs, crème fraiche, lardons, and Gruyère cheese.   But, if you stray from the standards, the culinary sky is the limit. Salmon.  Vegetables as far apart as onions and broccoli and asparagus.  Various flavorings.

Sadly, after my death defying bike ride a mile or two to the local grocer, I discovered crème fraiche and lardons are not part of the American diet, and the cost of Gruyère requires a down payment and credit check.

For the crème fraiche I had several options:  Use heavy cream alone, or add one tablespoon of buttermilk to a cup of heavy cream and wait 12 hours at room temperature for it to turn into crème fraiche.   Or, I could shoot from the hip and use half heavy cream and half sour cream. I drew fast and shot from the hip.  Fortunately, I’m a good shot.

Rather than forfeit my meager allowance on a bit of Gruyère, I grabbed a package of Baby Swiss. Flavors are nearly the same.

Lardons morphed into four slices of thick bacon, some fat removed, cut in small bits, fried and drained on a paper towel.

Of course, my friends in the U.K. or on the continent, will not have these problems.

Now that you know the secrets of my almost Quiche Lorraine, here’s the recipe.

Quiche Lorraine a Long Way From Lorraine

Heat the oven to 400ºF (200ºC)

Pastry crust (see note below the recipe for instructions)

1/2  pound of thick cut bacon, cut into bits, fried and drained

1 1/2 cup chopped baby Swiss cheese (usually comes sliced)

6 large eggs

3/4  cup of heavy cream

3/4  cup sour cream

Vegetarians never fear!  Just leave out the bacon/lardons and you will still have an amazingly tasty dish!

Smacking it together

Roll out the pastry crust, fit it in your pie plate, prick the bottom and sides with a fork, and put it in a 400ºF oven for 7 minutes.

When the piecrust comes out of the oven, turn the oven down to 350ºF, and set the pie crust aside.

Meanwhile, beat the eggs in a bowl, add the cream/sour cream and beat until blended or your significant other complains about the noise. Add the cheese and continue beating, complaints or not, until all is blended. 

Scatter the bacon chips on the bottom of the crust, then pour in the egg mixture. You may need a spatula to scrape all the bits of cheese out of the bowl.

Bake for 40 minutes.  All ovens are different, so check after 30 minutes.

After baking, put it under the broiler for 2 minutes, but watch it carefully.

I served this with a nice Alsatian rosé.

So how did it compare with the Alsatian version, the thing of dreams? Very, very close.  But, when I get the chance, I’m still going back to Place St Jacques.  You know how it is about the memory of old loves.

And yes, I am a guy who likes to quiche and tell.

No dinner is complete without an espresso and a glass of a charming Armagnac!

Pastry Crust:

1 ½ cups all-purpose flour

large pinch of sea salt

8 tablespoons of butter, cut into bits

6 tablespoons cold water

Put all the ingredients, except the water, in a food processor and pulse until all is blended. Should look like coarse meal.

Put the water in by spoon-full to spread it around.  Pulse again until the dough clumps together.  Roll it out thinly on a surface dusted with flour. 

So simple!  You will find yourself using this flaky crust over and over.

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Quiche That'll Make You Want to Quiche and Tell!

Quiche is timeless and adaptable to breakfast, lunch, or the middle of a Super Bowl when you’re out of breath from watching freakishly large millionaires run up and down a grassy field with an oblong, leather package.

And there’s nothing sissified about quiche, at least not when I make it with onions, bacon, cheese, milk, and eggs, and some chopped artichoke hearts, then bake it in a flaky, mouth-watering crust.  Goes well with just about any unsweetened beverage you can name.

What are some common complaints? Too eggy.  Too difficult.  Too Frenchy. Too Bridge-Party-With-the-Girls.  What? You don’t eat eggs, bacon, or onions?  And, my quiche is NOT eggy.

Quiche originally comes from the Lorraine region of France, so yes, it is Frenchy.  Wear a beret and speak with an accent like zis and zat, if it makes you feel better.

Ok, so you’re all, like, “I don’t like even eat, you know, the flesh of like living beings.”

Leave out the freaking bacon!

“But, I’m like you know a vegan-tarian.”  Fine. Want salt and pepper with your onions and chopped artichoke?

Just got back from Brussels.  My wife dined on quiche for breakfast.  It was delicious, but I figured I could do better than a restaurant’s baked-yesterday approach.  So can you.  And, it’s not tough to do.  And you will get cheers, a bouquet of kisses, and an offer of all earthly delights.

“Quiche me quick!”  Your wish, darlin’ is my ultimate pleasure. 

This recipe will feed six polite adults, or two teens. I used a 12 inch, deep dish pan.

First the pie dough, because it needs to sit in the refrig, for an hour.

2 ½ Cups all-purpose flour

½ Tablespoon Salt

½ Cup (1 Stick) of chilled butter

½ Cup shortening

4 Tablespoons ice water

Mix the flour and salt.  Using forks or a pastry cutter, cut the shortening and butter into the flour.  Sprinkle on the ice water.  (I normally do a bit of this and that, but the ice water should be measured, or the dough will be too soggy.)

Cutting in the butter and shortening

After adding the ice water.

Note:  Do not use a food processor to make pie dough.  The butter and shortening will be cut in too finely and the crust will not be as flaky.

Press the dough out into a rough circle, cover it front and back with plastic wrap and put it in the refrigerator for at least an hour.

Getting the dough ready for the frig. 

 After at least an hour, and before you start on the filling, roll the dough out in a circle and put it in the dish.  Pierce the bottom and sides with a fork.  Don’t be shy. If you don’t do this, the crust will bubble.

Paint the dough lightly with the white of one egg and bake it in a pre-heated oven at 375ºF for 15 minutes, or until it is a very light, golden tan.  Note: you will have egg white left over.  Note:  The crust will recede when it is baked.

Now for the filling

¼ pound of bacon, fried crisp, then chopped to half the size of your little fingernail.

6 Eggs, plus the extra egg yolk, and leftover egg white you used to paint the crust

1/3 Cup artichoke hearts, chopped.  Marinated hearts are ok, but use a paper towel to sop up the excess oil.

1 medium onion, peeled, halved and sliced thinly

2 ½ Cups grated Gruyere, or a similar cheese

2 Cups milk

¼ teaspoon nutmeg

Beat the eggs, nutmeg and milk in a large bowl.  Add everything else and mix well. Pour it into your pie plate, making sure the cheese gets spread evenly.  Slip the pie in the preheated oven and bake for 45 minutes, or until the top has brown spots and when you shake the dish, the center of the quiche doesn’t wiggle.

Ready to go in the oven. This is a 12 inch, deep dish pan.

 Out of the oven it comes!  Cheers erupt!  Champagne corks pop!  Women push and shove to get closer, except for the lank haired, skinny girl in the corner, but it doesn’t matter.  She’s got onion breath.

  

Zwiebelkuchen und Neuerwein

So many things happen in Germany in the autumn.  Weinfests. Oktoberfests.  Leaves molting from green to yellow, amber, brown, and red. A slight chill in the morning air. Best of all, it’s harvest time in the Vineyards.  Which means…

It’s Zwiebelkuchen and Neuerwein time!  Gets the heart pumping, doesn’t it!  Bet if you knew what the hell they are, your heart would pound a hole in your puny chest!  Just settle back and leave it to me to keep you informed and well fed.

Just to whet your appetite, sip some Neuerwein, or new wine.  It’s also called Federweißer, meaning feather white, from the bits of yeast still floating around.  Actually, it’s not new wine, its just headed in that direction.  Cloudy and generally 4% alcohol, it’s sweet and slightly bitter, with a hint of natural carbonation from the fermentation.  Matter of fact, the Germans only loosely cap it so the carbonation can escape.  At this point you’re having a conversation with yourself.  You’re not in Germany.  You’ve never heard of, let alone tasted Neuerwein, but by golly you’d like to try some!

Leave it to me to come up with a solution.  Let me amend that, to ‘leave it to my wife,’ who subs in the kitchen when she is not out working and slaving to support me.  Here’s the basic formula from La Cuisine de Chez Moi:

2 parts tonic water

1 part white grape juice

1 part dry white wine

Ok, it’s not exact, but it’s close.  Not satisfied?  Well, shell out some coin, you cheap bastard, and catch a flight to Germany!

On to the pièce de resistance, zwiebelkuchen, or onion cake.  Don’t know why they call it cake, since it’s more of an onion pie.   But, whatever you call it, grab a fork!  Don’t worry about a napkin; you won’t leave a crumb.

Before I start, here’s a disclaimer:  Every German grandmother makes a different version of zwiebelkuchen, so I took liberties, too.  In the first place, I prefer a lighter, flakier crust than you find on most commercial zwiebelkuchens, so I used a homemade pie crust. instead of the traditional yeast crust.  See video below.

Let’s have a drink and get started!

Preheat the oven to 430ºF (220ºC) ( after the crust comes out of the frig)

Favorite Pie Crust (this will chill for an hour)

2 1/2 Cups all purpose flour

1/2 Teaspoon salt

1 1/2 Cups butter

3-6 Tablespoons of ice water.

Rather than a lengthy explanation, just watch this short (less than 5 min), dynamite video and you’ll be an instant expert. http://allrecipes.com/video/265/how-to-make-pie-crust/

Pie Filling

Note:  Before you start on the filling, roll out the pie crust, put it in a pie pan and put it back in the frig while you make the filling.

3 Large onions, peeled, quartered, and thinly sliced

1 Cup raw bacon, diced

2 Cups Crème Frâiche

4 Eggs

Pepper

Nutmeg

Caraway seeds

Cook the onions on low heat, in a large skillet.  You want them translucent, not caramelized. About 15-20 minutes.  

When cooked the onions will reduce to about half this amount

Remove the onions and add the bacon to the skillet.  Cook until crispy.  Mix the onions and bacon in a bowl.  In another bowl, mix the crème frâiche, eggs, gratings of nutmeg and pepper.  When the onion mixture has cooled, mix it with the egg mixture.  Pour it into the prepared pie pan. Sprinkle on a few caraway seeds.

Slide the pie into the preheated oven and bake for 40-50 minutes.  Check it at the 30 minute point and if the crust is browning too rapidly, cover the pie with a sheet of aluminum foil.

You may have guessed that Zwiebelkuchen is very similar to Quiche.  No secret there.  Both come from roughly the same area.  Lorraine is now France, but has bounced back and forth, so a lot of recipes traveled.

Besides a flaky crust, another peeve of mine is an egg dish that tastes too eggy.  If I want scrambled eggs, I’ll make ‘em.  This recipe for Zwiebelkuchen is light and fluffy, without a hint of heavy egg flavor.

Now, quit dallying, pour yourself another Federweißer, and get to work!