STRANGE BUT TRUE CHEESE AND SAUSAGE BISCUITS BY THE CARELESS COOK

 

Morning came and The Careless Cook yawned and stumbled his way into the kitchen, with nary a thought of baking. That changed. He had made promises to a group of hungry ladies, and discovered he had less than two hours to bake and deliver. 

 

At once he was very sorry he had floated promises to anyone, especially after a night of…..well, anyway….

 

Rule number ONE.  Do not make promises. Especially not morning promises. Especially not to hungry ladies.

 

But even with a shortage of time, The Careless Cook never waivers. After all, the kitchen is a plaything and he was suddenly in the mood to play with one of his favorite toys: biscuits. Simple, easy, and after that, it’s anywhere you care to go.

 

Time is wasting! Let’s get to the basics of biscuits.

 

Oven to 450 deg

 

2 cups flour (3 cups if you’re using gluten free flour)

1 teaspoon salt

3 tablespoons baking powder 

1 stick of butter, melted

1 cup of milk (maybe a bit less. Not soggy.)

 

So simple.  Dry stuff together, then add the wet stuff and stir.

 

On that no so bright early morning, The Careless Cook decided not to go with sugar and nuts, although those are good. Instead, he rummaged through the frig.  Voila! A chunk of cheese. In this case sharp cheddar from Australia.

 

How much is a chunk? Whatever you’ve got, but not too much. A thick piece that fits right in the palm of your hand is about right. 

 

With cheese, The Chef prefers to shred instead of buying pre-shredded.

 

Then he found two chicken andouille sausages.

He chopped them up, then put them in the food processor and ground the fool out of ‘em.

The shredded cheese and ground sausage went in the batter and was mixed furiously.

 

At that point, time was running low and anxious, not because it took a long time, but The Caseless Cook had been too careless on when to start. 

 

Instead of making flat biscuits, he used a tablespoon to put lumps on the baking sheet and pressed them down just a little, with his clever fingers.

 

He had to use two baking sheets for all the biscuits, each batch in the oven for 12 minutes.

 

When done, an envoy delivered the goods, then he went back to bed.

 

Although he did consider a small cup of wine.

 

 

 

French Stew by the Careless Cook

Is this stew really French?  Well, kinda.  I started with what is a French stew, Navarin d’agneau, stewed lamb. But for various reasons, lamb doesn’t suit my tastebuds, so I used pork.  Yes, even the Careless Cook has some peculiarities, even if they are so few you’d barely notice. 

 

But, as my three faithful readers already know and expect, the Careless Cook views a recipe as just a mild suggestion. And besides, in this case I’d guess every French wifey and grandmother (femme et grand-mére) has a cherished recipe, handed down from the last time France won a war.  

 

But in between defeats, one would have to say, they have done well with memorable cuisine.  Which takes me back to the first time I had Fruit de Mer and a snail had the misfortune to try to crawl off my plate. Ever heard a snail scream? Then there’s my stories about the combination of French wine and French women, but I know you’d rather get on to the magnificent recipe.  Me too. Let bygones be bygones.

 

French Stew by the Careless Cook

 

Ingredients

 

2.2 lbs, or so, pork shoulder, fat trimmed, cut in 2-inch cubes
1 tsp salt

2 tbsps sugar
½ tsp ground black pepper
1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil

Herbs if you want. I did not use any.
3 carrots peeled and sliced on a diagonal
1 large onion, peeled and sliced in chunks
3 garlic cloves, peeled and thinly sliced
1 and a half cups red wine
4 cups chicken or vegetable stock. I used vegetable stock.
About 12 - 20 small new potatoes. I used a small bag full.
3 medium golden beets, peeled and cut into fairly large chunks
Jar of pearl onions, drained
2 tbsp butter
A good slosh of olive oil

 

Set the oven to 350 deg.

 

Puttin’ it Together

 

Put olive oil in a Dutch oven (or any large pot with a top) and toss in the chunks of meat. Turn up the heat. Stir until the meat is deeply browned.

 

Toss in the chunks of onions and garlic. Stir until onions are translucent. 

 

Add the salt.

 

Pour in the stock and stir a bit.

 

Add the sugar, potatoes, carrots, beets, and butter.

 

As the potatoes, add the red wine and the pearl onions. 

 

Bring to a boil, cover the Dutch oven and plop it in the oven. Set your timer for an hour and a half.

 

I served the stew with a baguette and a bottle of red wine! No French women were available. Had to settle for the wine.

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Sadly half the page has a white background.  No known way to remove the white background without an engineering degree and sacrificing the will to live.

 

Dirt Dabs by The Careless Cook

 

Dirt Dabs by The Careless Cook

 

No dirt in the recipe, so no shovels required.  Sit back and be prepared to bake delicious and deliciously easy cookies that you can just drop on a baking sheet and pop in the oven.

 

As usual, The Careless Cook did not use a recipe.  Some of the recipes he found were not to his liking, or were too sweet, or he didn’t have the ingredients and he was too pressed for time to race to the closest grocer.  He had a flock of hungry, older ladies depending on his charity and you know how demanding they are. One against many. No chance. Better get those cookies in the oven.

 

But NO recipe?  Well, once you know how to make cookies, you have the basics.  Flour. Sugar. Salt. Butter. The rest is up to your imagination.

 

The Careless Cook lacks a lot of things, but not imagination. For one thing, he talks too much.  So let’s get on with it!

 

Dirt Dabs

Heat the oven to 350ºF or 180ºC

Get a couple of baking sheets ready, spray very lightly with vegetable oil.

 

Ingredients:

 

2 cups flour

½ teaspoon salt

1 cup raisins, plumped (toss the raisins in simmering water, just long enough to get them soft.)

½ cup unsweetened cocoa powder (This is the Dirt!)

½ cup white sugar

½ cup brown sugar (either dark or light. I used light.)

1 stick  (1/2 cup) melted butter

2 eggs

½ cup rolled oats

½ teaspoon cardamom powder

¼ cup vegetable oil 

 

Puttin’ It Together

 

Mix all the dry ingredients, including the raisins.

 

Mix the wet ingredients. 

 

Mix well the wet and dry ingredients.

 

Plop the mixture, tablespoon by tablespoon on the baking sheets.

 

NOTE:  You can make the Dirt Dabs large or small.  I chose small and mine took about 10-12 minutes to bake.  Hey, I was baking for ladies!  If you’re baking for lumberjacks who eat with both hands, you will want to bake the big ones and they need to bake longer.  Either way, when the edges barely start to crisp, the Dirt Dabs are done.

 

And so are you!  Time to be so pleased with yourself you sit back, sip your Irish Coffee and wait for the compliments to flow.

 

Depending on how The Careless Cook is feeling, he may keep the Irish and give up on the coffee.

 

 

Scones with Macadamia Nuts by The Careless Cook

 

Scones with Macadamia Nuts by The Careless Cook

 

As my three faithful readers know, The Careless Cook is a proponent of regarding a recipe as a mere starting point, a rough guide, a batting of beautiful eyes from across the room, not a date, not a marriage, nor the last word on what goes in the oven.  No change in attitude when I first looked at this scone recipe.

 

The original recipe called for an egg.  I didn’t have an egg.  Of course the Kitchen Warrior did not let that stop him, and neither should you.

 

Then, there was another item that was not on hand. Heavy Cream.  Can you really make scones that taste like scones without something so essential as Heavy Cream?  Yes.  Will it taste OK?  Yes again.  Better than OK!  Rave reviews!

 

So, hopeful readers, what are the secrets to guide you to success?  Only a few: ingenuity, creativity, and no fear of failure.  Don’t worry about the last one, I got you ready! And ditto, you can skip the first two as well.  And if you don’t care for The Careless Cook’s standby ingredients and prefer to go back to the traditional way, he’s got you covered for that too. 

 

Time to stop the chatter and get cookin’, but first heat the oven to 400ºF!

 

Ingredients

 

2 cups all purpose flour 

½ cup sugar

½ teaspoon table salt

2 ½ teaspoons of baking powder

½ stick butter, chilled (straight from the refrig)

1 cup of oat milk (or ½ cup heavy cream and one egg)

(more oat milk or heavy cream for painting the scones before baking)

1 ½ teaspoons vanilla extract 

About 70 whole, salted Macadamia nuts (this bit of salt joins wonderfully with the sweetness of the scones)

 

Puttin’ It Together

 

Mix the dry ingredients in a bowl. Use a box grater to grate the butter and add the butter and work it into the flour mixture.  I used a dough cutter, but a couple of forks will work.

 

Mix the wet ingredients in another bowl.

With me so far?

 

Pour the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients and stir with a spatula or your fingers or anything else you have handy.  Keep mixing until you have the dough completely blended.

 

Using a tablespoon, drop the dough, spoonsful by spoonful onto a baking sheet.  This made 23 small scones for me. But don’t worry about the small size, they SPREAD while baking.

 

Paint the scones with oat milk or heavy cream.

 

Lightly mash in three macadamia nuts on each scone.

 

Place the scones in the oven and set your timer for ten minutes. Check to see if the edges of the scones are browning, as well as the macadamia nuts.  EVERY OVEN IS A LITTLE DIFFERENT, TEMPERATURE WISE.  I needed another 3-5 minutes.

 

The scones will flatten while baking and may stick to the baking sheet a bit.  I used a metal spatula to loosen them and gently lift them onto the counter to cool.

 

Time for a second cup of coffee. Don’t be ashamed to sip in a slosh of your favorite gift from Scotland.

 

I made these for a ladies group. Older ladies. Very grateful ladies, insuring that I will bake for them again and again.

 

Buttered Cheese Biscuits by The Careless Cook

 

 

Some recipes are so good you won’t believe they’re so easy. Even The Careless Cook was taken aback by how quick and simple this one is.  Don’t have much time?  No sweat, no bother.  

 

In my own situation, I was informed that I really should get out of bed, get to the kitchen, and make a pile of biscuits for a ladies’ group of eager eaters.  I had less than an hour.  Thirty minutes would be about right.

 

Extensive recipes were out of the question.  However, goodness was paramount. 

 

Buttered Cheese Biscuits

 

Still in my pajamas, I raced to the kitchen and set the oven for 450ºF.

 

Here are the these simple ingredients:

 

2 cups all purpose flour

2 generous tablespoons of baking powder

½ teaspoon salt

¾ cup of milk (I used oat milk because I like the flavor) Feel free to be generous with the ¾ cup and add a bit more milk if needed to make a soft dough

¼ cup of butter, melted 

¾ cup of shredded cheese (I used a pre-shredded mix of cheddar and pepper jack.  Using a bit more is better than a bit less.)

 

Whip this dough in shape! 

 

Time to use that big bowl and the wooden spoon.  Add all the dry ingredients, including the cheese, and mix well.  Then, add the milk and mix until you have a soft dough.  If it’s still stiff, add a bit more milk, but not too much!  You’re not making pancakes!

 

Scoop out generous tablespoons of dough and drop on an ungreased baking sheet.

 

Set your timer for 8-10 minutes and slip the biscuits in the oven.  With my oven it took the full 10 minutes.  You’ll know it’s done when the peaks are brown.

 

While the biscuits are baking, melt the butter.  I used the microwave. 

 

As soon as the biscuits are out of the oven, paint them with melted butter.

 

Ah, yes, just in time to feed the ladies’ hunger!  Also time to go back to bed.

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Chocolate Cookies from The Careless Cook

 

I baked a batch of chocolate cookies for a group of older women, which at my age are the only women I know. 

 

When I mention chocolate anything, it makes me wonder, is chocolate a drug?  It’s an honest question.  Men are addicted to the erotic, but women?  Would they really rather have chocolate?  Maybe that just goes for older women.

 

If anyone knows, please don’t tell me.  Let me live with my treasured, if inconvenient, fantasies.

 

The ladies lit into these cookies as if cookies were the barrier between starvation and living. 

 

Besides the flavor, another thing you’ll like, just like all recipes from The Careless Cook, these are quick and easy to make.

 

Chocolate Cookies

 

For me this recipe made 35 cookies

 

Begin by heading the oven to 350ºF (170ºC)

 

Ingredients

 

2 cups sugar

1 ½ cups butter or margarine, softened

2 large eggs

2 teaspoons vanilla extract

2 cups all purpose flour

¾ cup unsweetened coco powder (I used Ghirardelli – dark and rich!)

¾ cup sliced almonds (Not essential, but I love the crunch!)

1/3 cup dark chocolate chips, crushed (I used Ghirardelli) Also optional.

 

Puttin’ It Together

 

I used an electric beater, start to finish.

 

In a large bowl, cream the sugar and softened butter.  Add the vanilla extract, beat, then add the eggs and continue to beat until well blended. 

 

Add the almonds and crushed chocolate chips and mix well.

 

Next, put the dry ingredients in a separate bowl and stir.

 

Add the dry ingredients to the creamed mixture, a little at a time, and continue to beat until all is mixed.  The dough will be a little thick.

 

Drop heaping spoonfuls of dough onto an ungreased baking sheet.  Give them some room, as they will spread as they cook.

Bake for 8 to 10 minutes, depending on your oven.

Cookies will be soft.  Leave them on the baking sheet to cool for ten minutes before using a spatula to move them to a cooling surface.

This is a good recipe to make with grandchildren!  Easy!  Fun!

 

Now, back to the situation with older women and chocolate.  I think I know the answer.  All the older women went straight for the cookies, while none of them offered to sit in my lap. 

 

However there is much more research to be done.

 

 

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Turkey Bites (Wrapped Turkey Meatballs) by The Careless Cook

When I say Careless Cook, I mean it.  I’ve been making short-and-sweet sweets for a while, mostly for a couple of ladies’ Biblical gatherings.  Cookies, muffins, biscuits, scones, that sort of thing. They’re of a certain age and appreciate it.  But, they expressed the heart felt desire for something besides sweets.  Fine with me. I’d been thinking about moving out of the sweet rut, to offer them some savory treats, and tone down the mournful call of the Wild Sugar Beast.

 

I often find the ladies ask me to field questions, such as, what’s the difference between cookies and biscuits.  I avoid straight answers.  The truth feels so restrictive.  So, I tell them, you bake cookies at night and biscuits in the morning.  But, I don’t bake either one for women who ask too many questions. 

 

Time to stop the prattle and move on to the delightful recipe.  But, as I said, careless means careless.  I’ll give you this scrumptious concoction, but please know as I’ve said many times, do the best you can and that includes improvising, just as The Careless Cook does. Mix and match ingredients and change the amounts to suit your taste.

Turkey Bites

Heat the oven to 350ºF or 180ºC

 

Ingredients

 

½ stick butter, melted (for painting the crusts)

2/3 cup grated onions

1 cup grated cheddar

2 heaping tablespoons of Italian seasoning (My fav is The Spice Lab’s Italian Rustico, available on Amazon)

1 heaping teaspoon Dijon mustard

About ½ to 2/3 cup of Marinara sauce (I made my own, but use a commercial brand if you must)

About a pound of ground turkey, or a little more (I used 1.3 pounds ‘cause that’s what the package said.)

2 packages of commercial dough cut into approximately three inch squares for wrapping the meatballs (I used rolled out commercial pie dough)

salt and pepper to taste

 

Puttin’ It Together

 

In a large bowl, add all ingredients except for the butter and the dough. 

 

When you add the marinara sauce, remember you are trying to make a mixture that is squishy, but not watery!

 

I used my hands to mix everything together.  Add more of this or that.

 

Scoop up a slightly heaping tablespoon of the mixture and roll it into a ball.  This should come out to about 25 to 30 balls.

 

Put the balls on a four sided baking pan (you don’t want juices to overflow into your oven) and bake for about 15 minutes.  Do not over bake!  They’ll go back in the oven again after you’ve wrapped them with the dough.

 

Put each cooked meatball on a square of dough, fold up the corners of the dough, put them in greased muffin tins, paint them with butter and bake them for about 12 to 15 minutes, or until the tips of the dough are starting to brown.

 

Very tasty morsels for hors d’oeuvres, or to satisfy the non-sugar cravings of ladies of a certain age. 

 

 

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Biscuits à l'Orange (orange cookies)

 

Biscuits à l’Orange:  Orange cookies by the Careless Cook

 

I like cookies.  Perhaps it’s a throwback to childhood when I followed my mother around the kitchen.  Ah the aromas! And the excitement for a child!  Often she let me stir, or when things were too difficult for my childish fingers, she would explain and show me what she was doing and why she was doing it, this way and that.  And, of course, with pies and cakes and especially cookies, she let me lick the bowl.  Magic words when she handed me the dough covered spoon or the beaters, or the spatula. I’ve written earlier about my mother’s recipe for sugar cookies.  Never saw that?  Never made her sugar cookies?  Ah, I pity you for your loss.

Mom's Sugar Cookies

 

Today I have another cookie recipe, but this one didn’t come from my mother’s kitchen.  Matter of fact, it didn’t come from anyone’s kitchen but mine.  Bold statement, not having been in everyone’s kitchen. But, hyperbole is my stock in trade.

 

These cookies require little time to make, have few ingredients, cook fast, and the icing on top is so simple even an idiot can make it. I proved that.

 

 As Mark Twin famously said, “Reader, suppose you were an idiot.  And suppose you were a member of Congress.  But, then I repeat myself.

 

Biscuits à l’Orange (Orange cookies)

Heat oven to 325ºF or 160º

Ingredients

 

2 cups all purpose flour

2 sticks butter (a cup)

1 cup fine sugar (I put regular sugar in my electric coffee grinder)

2 tablespoons of grated orange rind

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 tablespoon of milk

 

The icing

2 cups powdered sugar

½ cup of milk, or maybe a little more. Be careful; you’re not making soup!

candied orange rinds for decoration (Make these while the cookies bake:  See below.)

 

Make the Cookies

 

Use a hand-mixer or food processor to cream the butter and sugar.  Add the flour and orange rind, mix well, then add the milk.

 

Roll out the dough to about a quarter inch thickness and cut into rounds.  I used a well-washed tomato paste can, with both ends removed, which gave me 28 cookies.  Put the cookie rounds on a baking sheet and slap ‘em in the pre-heated oven.  Bake for 15 minutes or until the edges are just barely starting to brown.  Note:  check the cookies once or twice on the way to 15 minutes! Every oven heats differently.

 

Candy the orange rinds

  

Cut a few tablespoons of orange rinds into very small pieces (see cookie photo)

Put them in a small pan or skillet.  Add a half water, half sugar solution and cook on low heat for about ten minutes.  Discard the sugar solution and put the candied rinds on a plate to dry and cool.

 

When the cookies are ready, move them to a room temperature surface or a cooling rack.

 

When the cookies are cool, dip or paint on the icing and immediately add some cooled candied orange rind on top of the soft icing for decoration.

 

If you didn’t make enough cookies, now you have a problem because your unruly guests will eat these by the handfuls and then want to take a bunch home.

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